Me and my work

I have decided to share my thought on my research here..well, I am working on an ethnocultural presentation of health help seeking behaviour among middle aged immigrant Malay women living in Melbourne. My focus is on how these women at their mid life, manage their psychological wellbeing and how the sociocultural and political environment shaped and reshaped their behaviour especially in maintaining or preserving their wellbeing.

Psychological wellbeing in this context is far beyond the health construct  or mental health rather it includes the physical, mental and social wellbeing. Here, it is not only at the individual level, yet also involve the community and structural participation.

My participants were the Malay women who have been migrated to Australia and got the Australian residency status, either as permanent resident or Australian citizen. I am trying to answer whether the Malay ethnocultural aspect would have some impact of their behaviours, if yes, in what way and how..or they have adapted the local surrounding? If the latter is true, how is the process and why..
now..
while researching on the topic..I found it is hard to define the "Malayness"..it is complex and far beyond the concept of ethnicity...hence I asked my self...am I a Malay...or rather a hybrid of the Malay..rather than exposing my data/result here..am sharing my experience of having some mixed blood.

I was asked many times by my children..who are they? Well..there is mixed blood in me. My great paternal granny was a Pakistani trader who married a local malay woman, that seemed to have some Chinese blood too. So, rather than a pure Malay stock, me myself was rather un"Malay". Phenotypically, I looked pan asian...during my childhood, because of my look, I got teased out. The boys teased me and called me "Bengali Putih"..well am fair enough and am looked different from other malays kids. Though adults used to praise me of my look..they told me that am pretty (well not to show off, but rather to share my experience), I could not take that as a compliment because the teasing (Bengali putih) was really disturbing. I hate it a lot..hence I hate my appearance...I did not think that I am pretty as what the adults said. I prefered to be plain Malay then..

But here in Australia, things are different..my childrens are proud that they have mixed blood..they even published their status in their social media sites..as
Mixed Paki + Chinese + Siamese (because my hubby has some siamese blood in him)
perhaps Australia is so mixed, then this mixture is something normal.

One of them told me that once his friend commented on his eyes..saying that he has small eyes but has light brown complexion..hence who are you? because your eyes look like Asian but your skin is not yellow..or not even brown as Indian..so who you are? hence he told them that he is a Malay..rather I think he said Malaysian..unfortunately..there was lots of Malaysian in their school but chinese decendent..so the kids were confused..
             Malaysian= Chinese = Asian
and where got this Malay?

Hence Malay = Mexican but not Latin?
So..malayness is so confusing then hehehee..

p/s: this is not an academic writing!